The Pros And Cons Of Blind Dates

The Pros of Blind Dates

No one is the first person to put their hand up and volunteer to be set up on a blind date. It would be a rare person who preferred blind dates over choosing their own date. But what exactly is a blind date, and how different is it from meeting someone virtually online or in person?

Most people enjoy the mystery and the intrigue that comes with blind dating someone they have been set up with, but there are more reasons to consider accepting a blind date, so let’s look at what they might be.

A blind date is a great opportunity to acquire a new friend. Not all blind dates will be successful or result in you being set up with your forever person. Logically, the chances of that are slim. However, your friends know you well, and if they believe someone they know equally as well would be a good match for you, why would you not accept a blind date? Even if there is no chemistry for a romantic relationship, you might discover interests you share that deliver a new friend with whom you can undertake the mutual interests.

Blind dates are typically arranged by people who know you well and consider you to be good friends or family. They are not going to set you up with someone just for the sake of it, knowing that you will blame them if it turns out to be a horrendous date.

Blind dates have led to strangers entering serious long-term relationships. Love at first sight may not be instantaneous for everyone, but it does happen often enough to keep romance novels selling like hotcakes. 

If you are shy and lack dating experience, going out on a few blind dates that your friends and family organise, might give you some much-needed practice. You learn quickly how to engage and use small talk and icebreakers to get conversations rolling. Any experience with meeting strangers will give you confidence; the more often you do it, the more confident and less shy you become. 

Even if your blind date turns out to be a total bust, blind dates give you the chance to get out of your home and enter new places you have not ventured. You might find a lovely restaurant, café or bar to which you have to bring your friends back, or maybe your next date.

The Cons of Blind Dates

Most people prefer to avoid being set up on a blind date at all costs. They will come up with every excuse in the book and give plenty of reasons why they cannot go out with someone they have never met. Their reasoning is typically that it is too risky, or they won’t be their type. The element of danger is always present in any form of dating with any person you undertake it whom you don’t know. Some other reasons people bail on the idea of a blind date are as follows.

You ultimately need friends and family who know a variety of people. If you don’t have access to friends who have a lot of friends, or family members who are part of a social club etc., you are unlikely to find them suggesting a blind date.

Some people hit it off immediately with their blind date, and by refusing to enter a blind date, you could miss out on meeting an extraordinary person.

People are by nature judgemental in advance when it comes to blind dates. Expectations can be unrealistic or underwhelming when presented with the reality if one or both parties have been hyped up by the person trying to make the connection.

The stigma around date rape and having drinks spiked is real. There is the fear that the person they are being set up with could be dangerous, have nefarious intentions or may become obsessed with them in a one-sided fatal attraction. While there is always a risk, you can negate it by only going out with people your true friends and family recommend and who can be verified and vouched for should the need arise.

A lot of people do not want to risk being rejected and humiliated. What if that person sees you and walks the other way? What happens if they stand you up? When stepping out of your comfort zone in any area of life, there will always be risks, but don’t let the fear of something imaginary that might happen stop you from doing it. If it happens, then so what? Maybe it happened because the person you are fated to meet steps in where your loser blind date bailed. Everything for a reason, so don’t allow fear to prevent you from meeting people. Fear is a self-created sabotage device, don’t do that to yourself!

Another disadvantage of blind dates is that you meet up only to discover that you have nothing in common and can’t stand the person opposite you for a host of reasons. You can see why they are single. They are arrogant, rude, obnoxious, debasing, narcissistic, a drama queen, a gold digger or generally unpleasant to be around.

You might need to reassess what kind of friends you have and why they lied about the date’s appeal. They may have intentionally set you up for a bad date out of some perceived spite, or they had good intentions but made a lousy matchmaker.

Allow for the person who matched you to be aware of the fact that ‘the date’ is secretly attracted to them, and they are not interested, so you were matched in a bid to ‘off-load’ them onto someone else.

Blind dates are not for everyone, and most people will only do one, maybe two at the most, in their life due to them being awkward and having the potential to be a bad time. However, if you are single and looking for something to kill time, they could be the answer and turn out to be great fun to boot. 

Always take safety precautions and practice dating safety. Only meet them in public places where there is plenty of security and other people around. Never leave your drink unattended, and always listen to your gut feeling. You can end a date at any point if you are just not into it and don’t have the time or energy to invest in seeing it out. Be polite at all times but be honest, admit they are not your type and wish them good luck finding the person for them. Do not let them walk you back to your car. 

If blind dating is not for you, there are many other ways to meet people. Try speed dating! Does speed dating work? Yes! It takes away the fear factor and allows you to meet multiple people at one time and place. You only need to exchange numbers with people you match who want to meet you. For people who don’t have the confidence to ask for numbers, and to prevent people from asking for numbers that less direct people do not want to give them. The contact details exchange is usually conducted by the speed dating host, who compares lists to see what people ticked your name and if you ticked theirs. If there is no match, they don’t get your contact details. So what are you waiting for?